Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Monday, June 29, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
CHECK THIS SHIZ OUT!!!
Step right up to my girl Stephs blog at= http://smo17.blogspot.com/2009/06/contest.html to enter her competition for the fabulous prizes she has on display! Trust me it’s worth it! I’m totally pimping that shiz right here! Just for the fun of it make sure you follow her to! It’s always a good read!
Gone BYE BYE'S
So I haven’t updated in awhile. I guess i've been in a bit of a funk lately.
Nic announced last night that she’s moving out. We knew on like Friday that she wasn’t all that happy. She chose not to hang out with me and the boys and instead just went to her room with Hadley. She hadn’t really spoken to me much since I snapped at her on Wednesday. I don’t know if I chronicled it on here or not but Nic hasn’t done any cleaning for over a month now. I’m talking no dishes no nothing. She didn’t even clean up her coke that exploded all over the kitchen bench. So yeah anyway with Gen finally moving her furniture and stuff out we hauled my fridge upstairs from the garage and pulled all the stuff out of Gens. Nic was originally helping me but started tryna tell me what to do etc and then started eating my food. All pretty petty shit but I was over her bull so called her on it. In the end I got mad at them both and kicked her out of the kitchen by telling her to fuck off. Whatever I don’t care. I text her the next day and said sorry if I snapped. Blah blah all the stuff I needed to say. I decided just to let it all go and on Friday text her to see how her day was etc and things were fine. Which is why I don’t get why all of this happened? On Friday night she took off downstairs and me n the boys had a few drinks and hung out listening to all of the old ass songs that we could find. It was fun and relaxing. Saturday morning I woke up and hung out with Carlos for a little while till he left for soccer and everyone else went out. Then I went n got lunch etc with my granddad and sister and came home to lax. Nic seemed grumpy from then on even though none of us could think why. She started cooking dinner and I went outside to the boys and we decided to get some smoke. All good I rang the person needed and me and Shane went to get it. When we got back I then had to leave to get a bottle of wine etc and came home just in time for dinner. Nic didn’t say anything to me when I thanked her for dinner and stuff so I was just like umm ok. Nic went to bed at 8pm!!!! On a Saturday. We just let it go and then had a smoke and whatever. Hung out for awhile and gradually fell asleep.
Side note- woke up on the couch to Shane sniffing my feet! WTF!!!!!!
Anyway yeah so went to bed at like one after sleeping on the couch for awhile haha! Me Carlos and Shane all fell asleep on separate couches. Both Carl and I got woken up by Nic at 7.45 the next morning which isn’t that strange for us to be up that early but the way Nic woke us up was weird. Slamming doors and stuff then she took off back downstairs. I was falling asleep after like an hour of being up so I went and took a nap and could hear the others chatting. When I got back up Nic and Hads were gona and I was informed that they were gone for the day and me and Carl didn’t need to worry about her for the rest of the week for food. Later on she came home and left like straight away and told Shane she would be out for the next few nights. Last night she came home, walked up to the boys and told them she would be moving out. She then text it to me later. I can’t believe she didn’t even have the balls to say it to my face! It was pretty guttering really. I didn’t know what to say to her and told her as much. Ugh life can throw you some curve balls I guess.
I don’t have much more to say other than I thought it all over and none of it matters. I can feel sadness but at the end of the day I still have some amazing friends, my family, my health and a job in this shiteous economy! So who am I to complain?
Nic announced last night that she’s moving out. We knew on like Friday that she wasn’t all that happy. She chose not to hang out with me and the boys and instead just went to her room with Hadley. She hadn’t really spoken to me much since I snapped at her on Wednesday. I don’t know if I chronicled it on here or not but Nic hasn’t done any cleaning for over a month now. I’m talking no dishes no nothing. She didn’t even clean up her coke that exploded all over the kitchen bench. So yeah anyway with Gen finally moving her furniture and stuff out we hauled my fridge upstairs from the garage and pulled all the stuff out of Gens. Nic was originally helping me but started tryna tell me what to do etc and then started eating my food. All pretty petty shit but I was over her bull so called her on it. In the end I got mad at them both and kicked her out of the kitchen by telling her to fuck off. Whatever I don’t care. I text her the next day and said sorry if I snapped. Blah blah all the stuff I needed to say. I decided just to let it all go and on Friday text her to see how her day was etc and things were fine. Which is why I don’t get why all of this happened? On Friday night she took off downstairs and me n the boys had a few drinks and hung out listening to all of the old ass songs that we could find. It was fun and relaxing. Saturday morning I woke up and hung out with Carlos for a little while till he left for soccer and everyone else went out. Then I went n got lunch etc with my granddad and sister and came home to lax. Nic seemed grumpy from then on even though none of us could think why. She started cooking dinner and I went outside to the boys and we decided to get some smoke. All good I rang the person needed and me and Shane went to get it. When we got back I then had to leave to get a bottle of wine etc and came home just in time for dinner. Nic didn’t say anything to me when I thanked her for dinner and stuff so I was just like umm ok. Nic went to bed at 8pm!!!! On a Saturday. We just let it go and then had a smoke and whatever. Hung out for awhile and gradually fell asleep.
Side note- woke up on the couch to Shane sniffing my feet! WTF!!!!!!
Anyway yeah so went to bed at like one after sleeping on the couch for awhile haha! Me Carlos and Shane all fell asleep on separate couches. Both Carl and I got woken up by Nic at 7.45 the next morning which isn’t that strange for us to be up that early but the way Nic woke us up was weird. Slamming doors and stuff then she took off back downstairs. I was falling asleep after like an hour of being up so I went and took a nap and could hear the others chatting. When I got back up Nic and Hads were gona and I was informed that they were gone for the day and me and Carl didn’t need to worry about her for the rest of the week for food. Later on she came home and left like straight away and told Shane she would be out for the next few nights. Last night she came home, walked up to the boys and told them she would be moving out. She then text it to me later. I can’t believe she didn’t even have the balls to say it to my face! It was pretty guttering really. I didn’t know what to say to her and told her as much. Ugh life can throw you some curve balls I guess.
I don’t have much more to say other than I thought it all over and none of it matters. I can feel sadness but at the end of the day I still have some amazing friends, my family, my health and a job in this shiteous economy! So who am I to complain?
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Adventurous..
Yip that’s the word I’m going to settle on to describe my weekend. I must say it was like the best weekend I have had in so long!
On Friday night I picked up one of my girls (Jess) who I’ve known as long as Gen. we’ve always had a tumultuous relationship especially in the last few years but we're patching it up. She’s my friend soul mate I believe. We did everything for the first time together. Drinking..smoking..sex (not with each other) everything! So anyways I picked her up and we went to get all you can eat Chinese and it was so good. I was so full I couldn’t even move haha. We went back to her place to hang with her sister for a little while then went to go and watch THE HANGOVER! Omg without a doubt the funniest movie I have ever seen. Like seriously I laughed so hard and for so long! Well worth going to watch it. And my gosh Bradley Cooper is one fine piece of male. After that I just dropped her off and went home to bed. No one else was up so I crashed out pretty easy.
I woke up at like 7 in anticipation of getting my tattoo done lol. I was so nervous I honestly think it was lucky I didn’t chicken out. In the end I decided that I was going to do this for the baby that I didn’t get the chance to bring into the world. I picked jess up and made my way to the parlor and… I freaking did it!!!!!! I am now the very proud owner of a tattoo that says “VIVERE SENZA RIMPIANTI” which stands for to live with no regrets. I got it put on my upper left shoulder and I seriously love it. I look at it all the time lol. The only prob is my skin around it really hurts cause i'm allergic to the tape I used for my cover. But its cool man I have a tattoo. It didn’t hurt nearly as much as I thought. After that I headed home to lax and watch gen take her stuff outta the house which was..weird. I miss her so much but feel like cause I’m perceived to have “stuffed up” I don’t get to. But oh well. We will see what happens. Like when I got home from getting my tattoo she was there and she didn’t even know I was getting one. it was strange. But anyway I hung out at home then got picked up to go to family dinner where my whole family took it in turns to look at my tattoo and give me shit.
I got some bad news which I will talk more about at a later date but I found out that a family member has cancer which is devastating..
Anyway after the news I got drunk and caught the bus into town to meet the others and have a good night out! It was fun I must say lol. We ended up getting kicked out of this awesome club called Bungalow 8 cause Nic was so wasted she fell asleep. It was a crazy night. Dancing on the bar…so many shots etc… I had so much fun. I damn near died yesterday. I lay on the couch all day trying not to vomit! It was horrific! I came right at like 8 last night though. Just in time to clean up the feral pit that is my house. Carl and I did a test to see how long nic's rubbish she has spread all over the house will take to get picked dup and none did! I’m gonna have to talk to her cause I cant remember the last time I saw her clean anything and it aint right that me n carl are carrying the burden… hmm anyway this is a long post…
Btw.. Currently listening to Cat Stevens “Wild World” awesome song!
Yip that’s the word I’m going to settle on to describe my weekend. I must say it was like the best weekend I have had in so long!
On Friday night I picked up one of my girls (Jess) who I’ve known as long as Gen. we’ve always had a tumultuous relationship especially in the last few years but we're patching it up. She’s my friend soul mate I believe. We did everything for the first time together. Drinking..smoking..sex (not with each other) everything! So anyways I picked her up and we went to get all you can eat Chinese and it was so good. I was so full I couldn’t even move haha. We went back to her place to hang with her sister for a little while then went to go and watch THE HANGOVER! Omg without a doubt the funniest movie I have ever seen. Like seriously I laughed so hard and for so long! Well worth going to watch it. And my gosh Bradley Cooper is one fine piece of male. After that I just dropped her off and went home to bed. No one else was up so I crashed out pretty easy.
I woke up at like 7 in anticipation of getting my tattoo done lol. I was so nervous I honestly think it was lucky I didn’t chicken out. In the end I decided that I was going to do this for the baby that I didn’t get the chance to bring into the world. I picked jess up and made my way to the parlor and… I freaking did it!!!!!! I am now the very proud owner of a tattoo that says “VIVERE SENZA RIMPIANTI” which stands for to live with no regrets. I got it put on my upper left shoulder and I seriously love it. I look at it all the time lol. The only prob is my skin around it really hurts cause i'm allergic to the tape I used for my cover. But its cool man I have a tattoo. It didn’t hurt nearly as much as I thought. After that I headed home to lax and watch gen take her stuff outta the house which was..weird. I miss her so much but feel like cause I’m perceived to have “stuffed up” I don’t get to. But oh well. We will see what happens. Like when I got home from getting my tattoo she was there and she didn’t even know I was getting one. it was strange. But anyway I hung out at home then got picked up to go to family dinner where my whole family took it in turns to look at my tattoo and give me shit.
I got some bad news which I will talk more about at a later date but I found out that a family member has cancer which is devastating..
Anyway after the news I got drunk and caught the bus into town to meet the others and have a good night out! It was fun I must say lol. We ended up getting kicked out of this awesome club called Bungalow 8 cause Nic was so wasted she fell asleep. It was a crazy night. Dancing on the bar…so many shots etc… I had so much fun. I damn near died yesterday. I lay on the couch all day trying not to vomit! It was horrific! I came right at like 8 last night though. Just in time to clean up the feral pit that is my house. Carl and I did a test to see how long nic's rubbish she has spread all over the house will take to get picked dup and none did! I’m gonna have to talk to her cause I cant remember the last time I saw her clean anything and it aint right that me n carl are carrying the burden… hmm anyway this is a long post…
Btw.. Currently listening to Cat Stevens “Wild World” awesome song!
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Work Frustrations!!
Hmm well I think its time for my monthly visitor. I feel like the worlds biggest bitch at the moment. Work is so frustrating. With the world being in a recession my job as a credit controller is becoming increasingly hard. People at my company are being laid off left right and center and everyones hours but my departments are being reduced. My job just seems so never ending. I feel so strung out some days when im here. I look after at least 5000 customers by myself and its crazy. I have someone helping me at the moment but very shortly they wont be. My boss is no help either. she offered me to apply for this job in another part of the country but then says nothing more about it and I found out she offered it to someone else in the company as well. Wtf? Is she trying to play us off against each other? Ugh its so annoying!
Lol well that little bitch fest made me feel a wee bit better! I cant wait to get my tattoo although im so scared its going to hurt. Everyone keeps telling me it will be fine but I cant help but be scared. The cruddy thing is that I have family dinner after I get it which means im really gonna have to hide it lol. Oh well! Wish me luck everyone! Im so going to have to post pics when I get it!
Lol well that little bitch fest made me feel a wee bit better! I cant wait to get my tattoo although im so scared its going to hurt. Everyone keeps telling me it will be fine but I cant help but be scared. The cruddy thing is that I have family dinner after I get it which means im really gonna have to hide it lol. Oh well! Wish me luck everyone! Im so going to have to post pics when I get it!
Sunday, June 7, 2009
100th post!!!
I’m starting to feel like my own brain is turning its back on me. I couldn’t sleep last night. All I could think about was babies. I know I’m so young and I’m single and I have nothing other than love to offer a child in this life but my god that doesn’t stop me from thinking about having one constantly. It’s like every time I have sex, even when it’s protected I start to think what if. Ugh it’s so annoying like I start to feel sick and stuff. Ugh I had to spend the whole day in bed yesterday cause I wanted to vomit. After I cleaned the house that is. I talked to Shane about what I overheard and he claimed that he was saying he understands that when I say mean things its cause I want him to stop hitting on me all the time. That and it will take him awhile to get over this shit blah blah and to bear with him. Also that what him and carl were saying about Nic is just boy talk blah blah blah, god males are pigs lol that’s all I have to say on the matter!!
So anyway life other than that is good! I’m getting my tattoo done in 5 days. I’m so nervous about the pain because i'm the first to admit that I’m a wimp but then I think to myself that it will only be for a little while and then it’s something I get to keep for the rest of my life! I’m excited and nervous! Haha I forgot to tell you all the Tonz has come back into our lives. What a surprise… she’s broken up with Jordan and cause gens still hanging with him she’s gotta find some new friends. It’s weird.. I dunno what gens doing but the path in life that shes taking is certainly not the one I would choose. She’s burning bridges faster than a pyro.. oh well her choice. Were meant to be going away for a girls weekend next month.. Hmm we’ll see!
So anyway life other than that is good! I’m getting my tattoo done in 5 days. I’m so nervous about the pain because i'm the first to admit that I’m a wimp but then I think to myself that it will only be for a little while and then it’s something I get to keep for the rest of my life! I’m excited and nervous! Haha I forgot to tell you all the Tonz has come back into our lives. What a surprise… she’s broken up with Jordan and cause gens still hanging with him she’s gotta find some new friends. It’s weird.. I dunno what gens doing but the path in life that shes taking is certainly not the one I would choose. She’s burning bridges faster than a pyro.. oh well her choice. Were meant to be going away for a girls weekend next month.. Hmm we’ll see!
Saturday, June 6, 2009
confusion
wow i just overheard the most fucked up convo between shane and carlos. weve all had a smoke so i dont know how i should take it but it still kinda bugged me. it took me awhile to hear what they were talking bout cause we just had a smoke. but yeah anyway i tuned into the convo right around the point where i heard shane saying that it hurts him when i say some stuff to him sometimes and that one day he will... something i didnt here... in year he should be over it...i dont entirely understand what the deal is and then i heard carl say that oh well at least the other one has wet dreams about you and shane was like yeah i think if she didnt have a boyfriend i think we would be bangin god i wanna now what shane was saying about me! grr this makes me so mad. like what the fuck. maybe they should think about their actions before saying shit like it hurts. well maybe if shane wasnt constantly trya get in my pants then i wouldnt be continously forced to say jnow. and my god if hes in love with me then get the fuck over it. i have not and will not be interested in you! my god. at the same time i know they are just boys being boys but still... any advice on how to handle this?ps i just had ta act like im emailing someoe cause none of my friends have seen my blog and i dont want them to catch onto its locatio!
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Just a little confusion...
So I made a decision last weekend that I have kept pretty quiet. I’ve always wanted to get a tattoo but haven’t had the balls to do so, and I guess I’ve never really known precisely what I want. I’m such a geek in the way that I picked my tattoo. Hayden panniterre from heroes got the tattoo a couple of weeks ago and when I saw it I knew straight away! It’s going to say “vivere senza rimpianti” which is Italian for “to live with no regrets” which is how I live my life. I really can’t wait for it!
I’m finding it increasingly hard to post about things when I feel happy. I have noticed a slight hollow in my life where I imagine a good man should be. I’m going through a periods where I am feeling the urge to cuddle up on the couch with a guy and relax blah blah all that kinda stuff. And then at the same time I see Nicola and Hads holed up in her room while i’m laughing it up with the boys and I change my mind! This is probably going to be one of my more unorganized pointless posts i’m afraid. Haha the ref at soccer called me tough on Monday night whilst watching me battle it out for the ball with a man. I have to admit I felt proud lol. I’m gonna have to hold on to that feeling whilst I wait for my tattoo!
Ugh Marc bought up our stupid bet yesterday as those of you on facebook may know! I really don’t wanna streak but at the same time I have the bet with Carlos and if I back out of my streak with marc then I know he will use that to his advantage and refuse to wear the dress, god its going to be so embarrassing if I do it!! I’m really not looking forward to Doug or Shane seeing me naked. I get so sick of Shane finding reasons to touch me or hug me. For the love of god man I’m not and will not be interested! I have had only one moment where I contemplated getting into his bed naked cause I needed a male fix but it is so not worth it!
Hmm what else can I post about? I’m just happy ya know. Albeit a little lonely but regardless i’m happy. Ive been writing this blog for something like 9 months.. it feels like so much longer.. And i'm still holding onto the faith that when the timing is right some one will walk into my life and sweep me off my feet! Ugh bring on Christchurch! I need a holiday!
******UPDATE*******
I am so freaking sick of having people walk all over me! I have been cleaning the house nonstop lately with n help from nic or shane and a little help from carl and it just gets messed up again straight away. I do the dishes all the fucking time! And noone helps! At work people borrow my shit and don’t even have the courtesy to give it back to me, they just dump it on the desk wherever they feel like. The other night we were stitting around having a few drinks and a smoke and I just felt like I was surrounded by negativity! God it was annoying. It feels like im the scape goat for when they wanna give everyone shit and ive had enough. On Saturday Shane volunteered to look after his newphew at the house which was fine, I knew he would need my help but in the end I looked after him the whole freaking day while shane sat on his fat lazy ass playing lame ass cell phone games. God it was annoying. He wouldn’t even come see Noah when he woke up. I had to get him u and changed and then Shane went out and smoked some weed. How freaking irresponsible can you get?
I want to stop doing all the cleaning and stuff but I don’t wanna feel like the house maid! Ugh frustration levels just reached boiling point!
I’m finding it increasingly hard to post about things when I feel happy. I have noticed a slight hollow in my life where I imagine a good man should be. I’m going through a periods where I am feeling the urge to cuddle up on the couch with a guy and relax blah blah all that kinda stuff. And then at the same time I see Nicola and Hads holed up in her room while i’m laughing it up with the boys and I change my mind! This is probably going to be one of my more unorganized pointless posts i’m afraid. Haha the ref at soccer called me tough on Monday night whilst watching me battle it out for the ball with a man. I have to admit I felt proud lol. I’m gonna have to hold on to that feeling whilst I wait for my tattoo!
Ugh Marc bought up our stupid bet yesterday as those of you on facebook may know! I really don’t wanna streak but at the same time I have the bet with Carlos and if I back out of my streak with marc then I know he will use that to his advantage and refuse to wear the dress, god its going to be so embarrassing if I do it!! I’m really not looking forward to Doug or Shane seeing me naked. I get so sick of Shane finding reasons to touch me or hug me. For the love of god man I’m not and will not be interested! I have had only one moment where I contemplated getting into his bed naked cause I needed a male fix but it is so not worth it!
Hmm what else can I post about? I’m just happy ya know. Albeit a little lonely but regardless i’m happy. Ive been writing this blog for something like 9 months.. it feels like so much longer.. And i'm still holding onto the faith that when the timing is right some one will walk into my life and sweep me off my feet! Ugh bring on Christchurch! I need a holiday!
******UPDATE*******
I am so freaking sick of having people walk all over me! I have been cleaning the house nonstop lately with n help from nic or shane and a little help from carl and it just gets messed up again straight away. I do the dishes all the fucking time! And noone helps! At work people borrow my shit and don’t even have the courtesy to give it back to me, they just dump it on the desk wherever they feel like. The other night we were stitting around having a few drinks and a smoke and I just felt like I was surrounded by negativity! God it was annoying. It feels like im the scape goat for when they wanna give everyone shit and ive had enough. On Saturday Shane volunteered to look after his newphew at the house which was fine, I knew he would need my help but in the end I looked after him the whole freaking day while shane sat on his fat lazy ass playing lame ass cell phone games. God it was annoying. He wouldn’t even come see Noah when he woke up. I had to get him u and changed and then Shane went out and smoked some weed. How freaking irresponsible can you get?
I want to stop doing all the cleaning and stuff but I don’t wanna feel like the house maid! Ugh frustration levels just reached boiling point!
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